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Thank you Mark,and to push this thread onwards towards 600,here is another.

BBC(Norfolk)

-Stewart White-Who had a world wide hit with "What a Wonderful World"?
Contestant-I don't know
White-I'll give you some clues:What do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
Contestant-Arm
White-Correct,and if you're not weak you're ....?
Contestant-Strong
White-Correct,and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
Contestant-Louis
White-Well there we are then.So who had a world wide hit with the song"What a Wonderful World"?
Contestant-Frank Sinatra?

From another place....

A WOMAN'S POEM:

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who’s handsome, smart, and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door.
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to 'how big is my behind?'
I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend.




A MAN'S POEM:

I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with
huge boobs and a nice ass who owns a bar on a golf course,
and loves to send me fishing and drinking. This
doesn't scan or rhyme and I don't give a shit.

good one that john from arran.

Anyone else think the 'Man from Craggy Island' has stepped over the line,? anyone?

Sorry Helene, the above should (of course) read Helen.

Hello Helen - I don't think Father Jack over on the craggy isle has overstepped the mark there but probably has described Richard Head's perfect woman. Don't think he is the disreputable Dick either or agrees with the sentiment - just passing on the message!

HI A, I was thinking Father Ted, but Father Jack works for me, I can't believe that Moll Flanders type books are very easy to come by on Craggy Island, and if they were, I'm sure Father Jack would ban them!!!!

it this is how the Fairytale of New York would be if the pc brigades got hold of it

You're a ***
You're a ****
You're an old **** on ****
Lying there almost dead on a **** in that bed
you *******, you ******
You cheap ***** ******
Happy winter festival your ****
I pray *** it's our last

you can fill in your own words

It's good to see David Beckham being an ambassador for English football. Shame about the haircut though. He once sported a "mohican", hair in a stripe down the middle; it was the result of a misunderstanding. Someone told him that to be a great footballer he needed to look like a Brazilian.

Sorry about that!