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celadon

30th October 2011, 11:22
Why men shouldn’t be Agony aunts.

Dear Phil
I left home for work last week and after less than a mile my car
stalled and wouldn’t start.
I walked back to my house and found my husband in bed with our 19 year old babysitter.
They announced that the affair had been going on for two years.
Can you help me…I’m desperate.

Dear Reader
The most common cause of vehicles breaking down in the first mile is dirt in the fuel lines. Hope this helps.
Phil.
1187 of 1953  -   Report This Post

celadon

13th November 2011, 10:51
Regretfully, this shall be the last 'poser'; as contributions have been drying up for some time now I feel that it has run its course. I sincerely hope that it has provided some education (sic), and amusement to the forum. I would like to thank all the members whom have contributed to the 'poser'.

Celadon.

Just received this:-

Hello My Friend,

Please don't be shocked or suprised. My name is Khamis Gaddafi I am the youngest son of Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi, and the military commander in charge of the Khamis Brigade of the Libyan army. It was rumoured that i have been killed during the war, first on 20 March 2011,, when several sources reported that i had been killed by a fighter pilot carrying out a kamikaze mission against the Bab al-Azizia compound Then on 5 August 2011, a rebel spokesman claimed i had been killed in an airstrike, though this was denied by Moussa Ibrahim, the spokesman for my Father,(Gaddafi regime).Most recently the rebels claimed that i died on 29 August 2011 when a NATO helicopter destroyed the car i was travelling in, but this was denied by the Libyan state television the following day 30 August and later reports suggested that i was still alive.

Please kindly keep this information secret because i was actually wounded by the NATO helicopter air strike and i am presently receiving treatment in a private Hospital here in South Africa .My purpose of contacting you is because i need your cooperation to move a trunk boxes weighing 2500 kilogramme of Gold and another trunk boxes weighing 1118 kilogramme containing 120 million united states dollars to your country over and your share shall be 25% of everything,please kindly keep secret because i do not want to be exradited back to Libya.

The trunk boxes are kept in private security and Vault company because most of our family fund in united Kingdom,USA,Swizterland,France,Germany and the rest of western Government has been freezed by the western Countries because of thier support for the NTC of the rebel.The rest of my families are seeking refuge in Algeria with the help of my Father's friend,President Abdelaziz Bouteflika

I want to know if you can really be trusted then i can reveal the contacts and how the boxes can be shipped to you over there .When you confirm to me that the boxes has arrived i shall make a move to meet you over there .If you are interested,firstly i want you to look for House for me in a nice and cool environment and tell me how much that cost. Once again please kindly keep secret because the rebel Government must not know that that i am still alive and they must not know my wherabout.
1188 of 1953  -   Report This Post

pastille

14th November 2011, 01:53
Celadon...love your thread! Have done for about a year now!

Ohh...I should have a first birthday PARTY!

Need to think of a good one to post...

We...the Persiflages should make more of your excellent commodity .....

Kissypoos

ps yes! Too much way, Too much wine!
1189 of 1953  -   Report This Post

pastille

29th February 2012, 17:00
Well...look what I found.

Wonder how Celadon is doing?

Anybody know?

p@
1190 of 1953  -   Report This Post

bees

29th February 2012, 19:40
Celadon.We can't let this thread die, Prople just couldn't find it any more.
Two questions:1. Is the artist formerly known as John from arran still out there?
2. When red squirrels get old, do they go grey?
1191 of 1953  -   Report This Post

pastille

29th February 2012, 23:21
So glad you responded Bees...

You are right, I loved this thread, and it should be resurrected/rejuvenated/resomethinged.

I think maybe what put people off was trawling through to get to the end...not realising the "shortcut" method.

WHICH...I will attempt to explain...oh dear here goes...

The thought of over a 1000 posts is daunting granted...

Skip to page two...

Look at the "header bar" it should read...

http://www.crosswordsolver.org/forum/15502/offset/10

Change the "10" to 1190 and it should bring you to the latest comments.

Hopefully...

John of Arran may still be around, as I suspect Celadon is too!

Love to them both.

p@
1192 of 1953  -   Report This Post

phillip

29th February 2012, 23:42
Ok Pastille, i'll revive it in the spirit it was always intended.......

A cat was sat by a river when it saw a 6 inch sausage floating by. The cat tried to grab it with its paw but missed. a few hours later a 10 inch sausage floated past, so the cat lunged at it to get it but missed. Another few hours later a 12 inch sausage floated past. The cat threw its whole body at the sausage and caught it...........
Moral of the story? The bigger the sausage, the wetter the pussy
1193 of 1953  -   Report This Post

pastille

29th February 2012, 23:47
Oooh you are so rude...

But thank you...need to remember a good one.

Until then...

A woman walked in to a bra...she was dyslexic!

p@
1194 of 1953  -   Report This Post

pastille

1st March 2012, 18:43
Well?...

Anybody?...
1195 of 1953  -   Report This Post

gok wan acolytes

1st March 2012, 18:49
Who sang Tiger Feet?
1196 of 1953  -   Report This Post