Crossword Help Forum
Forum Rules

Very true Bernie - never thought of that! :0)

Very tired, and not thinking straight - these painkillers are damn good! off to bed now!

Let hope that this stays in the UK!

SCIENTISTS have built the smallest petrol engine, tiny enough to power a WATCH. The mini-motor, which runs for two years on a single squirt of lighter fuel, is set to revolutionize world technology. It produces 700 times more energy than a conventional battery despite being less than a centimeter long not even half an inch. It could be used to operate laptops and mobile phones for months doing away with the need for recharging. Experts believe it could be phasing out batteries in such items within just six years.

The engine, minute enough to be balanced on a fingertip, has been produced by engineers at the University of Birmingham . Dr Kyle Jiang, lead investigator from the Department of Mechanical Engineering, said: "We are looking at an industrial revolution happening in peoples' pockets. "The breakthrough is an enormous step forward. "Devices which need re-charging or new batteries are a problem but in six years will be a thing of the past."

Other applications for the engine could include medical and military uses, such as running heart pacemakers or mini reconnaissance robots. At present, charging an ordinary battery to deliver one unit of energy involves putting 2,000 units into it. The little engine, because energy is produced locally, is far more effective.

One of the main problems faced by engineers who have tried to produce micro motors in the past has been the levels of heat produced. The engines got so hot they burned themselves out and could not be re-used. The Birmingham team overcame this by using heat-resistant materials such as ceramic and silicon carbide. Professor Graham Davies, head of the university's engineering school, said: "We've brought together all the engineering disciplines, materials, chemical engineering, civil engineering, and mechanical engineering. "What better place to have the second industrial revolution in nano-technology than where the first took place, in the heart of the West Midlands.

that article(mini petrol engine)was from the year 2003.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article80219.ece

Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but it can be read in prison?

More breaking news...Colonel Gadaffi has announced that he will hand himself over to NATO troops, but only on one condition - that he is tried at Edinburgh Sheriff court...

Was sent these "Tommy Cooperisms"

Thought I would share them...



A mate of mine recently admitted to being addicted to brake fluid.
When I challenged him on it he reckoned he could stop any time....



I went to the cemetery yesterday to lay some flowers on a grave. As I
was standing there I noticed 4 grave diggers walking about with a
coffin, 3 hours later and they're still walking about with it. I
thought to myself, they've lost the plot!!



I was at a cashpoint yesterday when a little old lady asked if I could
check her balance, so I pushed her over.



A new Middle East crisis erupted last night as Dubai Television was
refused permission to broadcast 'The Flintstones'. A spokesman for the
channel said. “A claim was made that people in Dubai would not
understand the humour, but we know for a fact that people in Abu Dhabi
Do.



My daughter asked me for a pet spider for her birthday, so I went to
our local pet shop and they were £70!!! B******s to this, I thought, I
can get one cheaper off the web.



Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not happy.



Went around to a friends house today. His wife was sat there with
their newborn baby. She asked if I'd like to wind it. I thought that
was a bit harsh so I gave it a dead leg instead.



I start a new job in Seoul next week. I thought it was a good Korea
move.

pastille - from a fellow harpy -

Should say love it!

TWENTY DOLLARS
On their wedding night, the young bride
approached her new husband and asked
for $20.00 for their first lovemaking
encounter. In his highly aroused state,
her husband readily agreed.
This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 40 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that
she needed.
Arriving home around noon one day, she was
surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state.
During the next few minutes, he explained that his employer was going through a process of corporate downsizing, and he had been let go.

It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find another position that paid anywhere near what he'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which
showed more than forty years of steady deposits and interest totalling nearly $1 million. Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the bank which were worth over $2 million, and informed him that they
were one of the largest depositors in the bank.

She explained that for more than three decades she had 'charged' him for sex,
these holdings had multiplied and these were the results of her savings and investments.

Faced with evidence of cash and investments
worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out, 'if I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business!'

That's when she shot him.

You know, sometimes, men just don't know when
To keep their mouths shut



Women are like phones: They like to be held, talked to, and touched often.
But push the wrong button and your ass is disconnected!