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There's a candidate in the very last clue, mattrom.

Oh...That one! Thanks, drxx. That only leaves me with 3 spare words looking for a home. I'll worry away at for a while, though.

Thank you, Drxx, for your parsing in. post 24. So we lose the outgoing word from 12a, which I thought was a perfect fit in 5d, and instead use the word from 14a there. Everything seems to balance at last. Clearly I wasn’t the only one to find this very confusing!

Sorry, rad - I'm not sure what you mean, because the outgoing word in 12a is the def (and I've got 12a as an 'incoming' - with 'soothes' added from 10a). What is the alternative addition you have for 5d?
I agree - it's a confusing piece of work!

Sorry (again) rad - I now see you mean 'outgoing' as in 'leaving', not as in 'the final word of'.