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trevor

9th August 2009, 00:30
Hi again, J From A.
Ya big old sexist.
The Guards could come from the fairer, gentler sex, or even one of each.

Then, of course the woman would be the lier.

Still, try and think before you act like a bigot.
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coline

9th August 2009, 14:26
Thanks JimB. Trevor has me sussed. If her husband had not been there, we might have discussed Brussells Sprouts. (whoever Brussells is)
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coline

9th August 2009, 14:35
Does anyone know if there is a way of going straight to the latest posting instead of having to scroll through a number of pages? If not, why not? (not why don't you know, but why is there not a way?)

Enjoy weird and wonderfull sense of humour on this site!!

Colin
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john (from arran)

9th August 2009, 16:40
There's no instant way to get to the latest posts but you can get there just a bit faster by doing this:

Open the first page of the thread and look at the URL. This will usually appear in the tool bar at the top and for this thread it is:

http://www.crosswordsolver.org/forum/15502/poser-of-the-day

Then delete the thread title from the url and replace with "offset/xxx" where "xxx" is the multiple of 10 which is just smaller than the number of replies. Again in this case (as this is reply 273, making a total of 274 posts):

http://www.crosswordsolver.org/forum/15502/offset/270

Press enter and hey presto you get to the last page. I haven't tried it, so I don't know what happens if you enter a number that isn't a multiple of 10 or a number that is larger than the total post count. I'll do that soon and if the whole site crashes you'll know who to blame!
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helena

9th August 2009, 18:26
i do not know why my laptop does it, but when you start to type a web adress it comes up with sites that you have already visited that begins with similar starts. so i just type in www.cross and then click onto the adress with the forum offset 270. i don't know much about computers, my son sets everything up for me.
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campanilla

9th August 2009, 19:30
John , while looking for something else I came across this and immediately thought of you! Just to show no hard feelings about the convoy!!

The knitting circle

It was the weekly meeting of the Lower Aspirations knitting circle, so named because its members sat in a large circle. The president, Hyacinth Hurst, had the most comfortable chair. Round the circle to her right were, in turn, Olive O’Reilly, Primrose Poole, Scarlet Smith and Violet Vincent.

That day, they were all knitting scarves.

“I suppose it was inevitable,” said Olive.

“What was?” said Primrose.

“Each of us is knitting a scarf in the colour of one of our first names.”

“So we are,” said Primrose. “It must be because we’re featuring in a puzzle column.” They all nodded. “And each of our names is the colour of only one scarf.”

“None of us is knitting a scarf whose colour is their own name,” Scarlet said.

“Or the name of a lady seated next to them,” added Violet.

“Not only that,” said Hyacinth. “But the lady whose scarf is the colour of the lady on the left of the lady whose name is the colour of the scarf being knitted by the lady on the left of the lady whose scarf is the colour of my name is sitting on my right.”

There was a stunned silence. This kind of thing was why Hyacinth was president.

What colour was Hyacinth’s scarf?

Now the absolutely vital information you'll need to remember:

1. Violet has been carrying on with Olive's husband for years.
2. Scarlet has just become a grandmother for the 13th time, unfortunately ever so slightly Chinese looking (absolutely nothing to do with the owner of the corner shop).
3. Primrose's peke has just given birth to puppies, unfortunately everything to do with Olive's mongrel (the dog not the husband).
4. Hyacinth is really Henry (but we don't talk about that, ever!!)
5. Scarlet runs a mail order catalogue in her spare time, just can't figure why everything comes in plain manila envelopes though.

Best of luck!
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campanilla

9th August 2009, 19:33
By the way, I'll be no help to you whatsoever, I'm not a member of the knitting class, just though I'd mention that.........
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trevor

9th August 2009, 19:51
Ha-ha,Campo,
Absolutely priceless post re Knitting circle.
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campanilla

9th August 2009, 20:01
Hi Trev, I'm surprised you haven't worked it out yet with your huge Presidential brain!!
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celadon

9th August 2009, 20:07
Just a guess :- Pe(a)rl
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