CancelReport This Post

Please fill out the form below with your name, e-mail address and the reason(s) you wish to report this post.

 

Crossword Help Forum
Forum Rules

rossim

2nd September 2016, 11:47
Why did the piece of Indian takeaway that I spilled the other night land on the white bit of my navy and white striped T-shirt?
1921 of 1953  -   Report This Post

chrise

2nd September 2016, 12:02
@ rossim
It's a special case of Murphy's Law called "The law of selective gravity" - any object dropped will fall where it can do the most damage.
1922 of 1953  -   Report This Post

jazzgirl

2nd September 2016, 12:30
I am taking photos in the vegetable garden and labelling them.
The first one is : "The awning of the cage of asparagus"
1923 of 1953  -   Report This Post

jazzgirl

2nd September 2016, 12:35
Could two crows on a fence be called "an attempted murder?"
1924 of 1953  -   Report This Post

rossim

2nd September 2016, 13:20

@ chrisE
Like the buttered side of the toast!
1925 of 1953  -   Report This Post

chrise

2nd September 2016, 13:35
I heard the story of a statistician who noticed that whenever his children dropped a piece of toast, it fell butter side up. Intrigued, he investigated further, and discovered that they were buttering the toast on both sides.....
1926 of 1953  -   Report This Post

rossim

2nd September 2016, 16:02
Did he not notice the mess on the carpet?!
1927 of 1953  -   Report This Post

chrise

2nd September 2016, 20:43
A statistician is a mathematician, rossim - I'm more surprised he noticed the toast!
1928 of 1953  -   Report This Post

elle

5th September 2016, 09:58
A Spanish language teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.

"House" for instance, is feminine: "la casa."
"Pencil," however, is masculine: "el lapiz."

A student asked, "What gender is 'Computer'?"

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher divided the class into two groups, Male and Female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether "Computer" should be a masculine or a feminine noun.

Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.

The men's group decided that "Computer" should definitely be of the feminine gender ("la computadora"), because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck to buy accessories for it.

(THIS GETS BETTER!)

The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be masculine ("el computador"), because:
1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on; 2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realise that if you had waited a little longer, you could have got a better model.

THE WOMEN WON!
1929 of 1953  -   Report This Post

rossim

7th October 2016, 23:17
Below is a list of ways to beat a women in an argument.













.
1930 of 1953  -   Report This Post