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Couldn't agree more Rossim.
There were lots of kids playing in our backyard whilst our children grew up. We only stepped in if the kids couldn't come to an amicable agreement themselves.
Even then we didn't lay down the law, we encouraged them to "sort it out" and agree to something between themselves.

BURGER chain McDonald’s has a secret menu that is even more repellant than its official menu, it has been confirmed.

Previously thought to be an urban myth, former McDonald’s manager Tom Logan confirmed the existence of the ‘Black Menu’ for its most depraved customers.

He said: “There’s a tiny hardcore of freaks who know the code phrase, ‘take me down, down, down to meaty town’. After saying that they can choose anything from the so-called Black Menu.

“Nobody knows where the Black Menu comes from, but it is believed to date back to medieval times.

“To make the Black Menu meals you have to go away on a special training course to Stoke on Trent, which last eight years. During that time you will be broken physically and mentally, then rebuilt with a new personality.

“However, afterwards you do get a 38p per hour pay rise.”

The McDonald’s Black Menu:

Large Pointless Burger Stack

“It’s just a dozen Big Macs stacked on top of each other, not sure why really. You only have to take it apart to get them in your mouth.”


Kingfisher In A Bap

“This one takes time to prepare because usually they shoot the kingfisher to order. However they do keep a box of ’50 x Frozen Kingfishers’ in the freezer for emergencies.”

Mince Shake

“Take a ball of mince the size of a fist, season, stick it in a blender with two scoops of fresh dairy ice cream.”

Questionable Chicken Thing

“No more or less rank than other chicken items on the menu.”

Fist O’Chips

“Take a ball of chips the size of a fist, and eat it.”

Lungs McMuffin

“Nobody knows where the lungs come from. From looking at them I would say maybe a monkey.”

Death On the Nile

“This one’s hard to describe. It’s a plastic box full of flies with a surprise at its core.”

The other day my neighbour, who is blonde, came running up to me in the driveway just jumping for joy!

I didn't know why she was jumping for joy. I thought, what the heck, and I starting jumping up and down along with her.

She said, “Sally, I have some really great news!" I said, "Great. Tell me why you're so happy."

She stopped jumping and, breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, told me that she was pregnant!

I knew that she had been trying for a while so I told her, "That's great! I couldn't be happier for you!"

Then she said, "There's more."

I asked, "What do you mean 'more'?"

She said, "Well, we are not having just one baby. We are going to have twins

Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, I asked her how she knew. She said...



(You're going to love this!)





“That was the easy part. I went to ALDI and they actually had a home pregnancy kit in a twin-pack. Both tests came out positive!”

A prospective husband in a book store "Do you have a book called, 'Husband – the Master of the House'?
Sales Girl : "Sir, Fiction and Comics are on the 1st floor!".

Wasn't long ago all the books attributed to Lance Armstrong about health, fitness, cycling, etc. in our local library were moved to the fiction section.

.....perhaps they should go in the re-cycling bin!

OH, THOSE FRENCHIES ARE SUCH GOOD SPORTS - coming soon to the Poser; French politically incorrect and racist jokes. You trolls have been warned .

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MARKS & Spencer is set to replace Percy Pigs with methadone at its tills.

Freely available over the counter with no questions asked, Percy Pigs have ravaged middle-class communities.

In the worst affected areas such as Guildford, parents can be seen openly scoffing the pink and purple sweets in front of their horrified children.

M&S manager Tom Logan said: “We didn’t realise the great evil we were about to unleash on the world. We will be providing methadone for anyone who wants to get clean.”

It is estimated that 0.1 percent of the UK population consumed Percy Pigs within the last calendar year, the vast majority hailing from one of the most vulnerable demographic sub-sets – those who do their food shopping at M&S.

Julian Cook, from Surrey, said: “I don’t even recognise myself any more. All I can think about is where I can get my next Percy from. And the answer is next to the posh crisps.”

Get on board with the latest craze, Percy Pig jigsaw puzzles.

http://www.harvesterfoods.com.au/ccdata/images/imageMain_62_1068.jpg

I have absolutely no idea what "Percy pigs" are - is that good or bad?


Your link reminds me of the story of the World Cup competition when David Beckham was England captain. He was looking miserable one morning, so the manager asked him what the problem was.

"I can't do this jigsaw puzzle. Look, there are the pieces, and there's the picture of the tiger, but I can't get any to fit."







"Put the Frosties back in their box, David."

Haa haa ChrisE.
Good one!!

I too had no idea about Percy Pig until my friend "google" helped me out.

Could be a rather difficult jigsaw puzzle to complete.